sunday night blues...
for the first time in a few years, i haven't had the sunday night blues!!! you know, the feeling the sunday is tainted by having to work on monday?...yeah, that. i do keep questioning my decision, however, and i need to let it go! it's done, it was God, and it's going to be a good thing.

i talked to someone today at the doctor's office (thanks for the plug, em and michel, barb was really good!) and she was willing to work through some stuff with me so my insurance won't know i'm talking "fertility" with her (heaven forbid they pay for something like that...). she ordered some "routine/preventative" blood tests to check my thyroid and something else(?can't remember?). told me to get a basal thermometer and do readings every morning and go back in little over a month, and if nothing's happened at that point, she'll put me on metformin to see if that will help me ovulate (i pray i can find a better insurance than the one i have now...and i don't want to have metformin on my "record" in case i do change instead of renew). if that doesn't work, then the next step is clomid, a fertility drug. i'm praying that we won't have to go any further than that. okay, God, i'm ready for you to work!! i know some people think it's weird i write this stuff here, but to be honest, i've gotta get it out somewhere and i need your prayers, please! physically and especially emotionally...