Sunday, January 25, 2009

where's the balance in faith?...
i'm having a bit of an internal struggle maybe you all can help me out with...your input and prayers would be appreciated. i wrote earlier about talking to someone about fertility meds and now that it's coming to time to go back after tracking my BBT and make a plan, i'm struggling with whether to go or not. on one hand, i, growing up as the daughter of a man who absolutely believes in the advances in modern medicine, want to go and get the drugs and see if we can get this baby started!! on the other hand, i wonder if i just need to wait for God's timing and see if anything happens... actually, i'm not as spiritual most the time when i think about this option...it usually goes more like "screw it!" and trying to make myself believe i don't care. that doesn't work too well. there are days i'm okay with one option, and other days i'm okay with the other. the other kicker is that the $5,000 maternity deductible we need to come up with for a pregnancy was necessary to complete the purchase of our house and the wheat prices are down. i'm praying HARD for answers!!! i don't feel like i'm getting any. i'm trying to figure out the balance between just trusthing that God's going to make things happen and not pursuing fertility stuff OR pursuing the wonders of modern medicine, all the while needing to trust God. hmmmmm......

1 comment:

emily said...

That's a hard call. What's having faith, and what isn't in this situation? This is what I would suggest: I'd go to the appointment and let Barb look at your BBTs and see what she has to say and what she'd suggest, and then make a decision. But I don't think there is a wrong decision here. But Barb might have some more insight that you haven't considered.

BTW, they will let you make installment payments on that deductible--that's what we did. We paid it over the 9 months. I'm praying for you.